As we reflect on the past 12 months and reset our to-do list with new hopes and dreams, let us prepare ourselves for the possible challenges. Events may not always go as planned. When there is a particular resistance hindering your goals, you may feel angry, annoyed or disappointed. Remember: These emotions are common and valid.
“The choices that you make when faced with frustration can determine whether you will experience growth, decline, or stagnation,” seasoned psychotherapist Sean Grover, L.C.S.W explained.
Grover, a sought-after inspirational speaker, designer of award-winning youth programs and author of Publisher Weekly’s Best New Nonfiction When Kids Call the Shots: How to Seize Control from Your Darling Bully and Enjoy Parenting Again, understands that some have difficulties to address the situation and choose the right path.
“Confronting it is the fuel that drives maturity,” he added. “When you engage and resolve frustration, you trigger a leap in maturity, a surge of confidence and a healthy burst of self-esteem.”
The Benilde Well-Being Center (BWC) of the De La Salle-College of Saint Benilde likewise encourages everyone to usher in a more positive, productive and fruitful new year with a renewed energy to face life’s adversities.
BWC echoed and shared Grover’s five-step process in transforming frustration into fuel, as shared on PsychologyToday.com, one of the world’s largest publishing enterprises exclusively dedicated to mental health and behavioral science.
Here are some reminders to embrace this coming 2023:
1. Confront frustrations.
At the root of it all is discomfort. Chances are you are dissatisfied. Perhaps you feel stuck at work or unhappy in a relationship. This leads to tense moments and more stress.
2. Set determined goals.
It is now time to consider your options. How can you confront the situation? What steps can you take to address it? Who are the players involved? Engaging frustration is never easy. But personal determination awakens courage. Consider options. Journal your concerns. Make a list. Plan. Rehearse. Gather support.
3. Test.
Anxiety can spike when you confront problems. You may experience doubts and push-backs. Others may be critical of you. They may discourage you, deny your requests or undermine your plans. Obstacles frequently appear during this time. Remember: an object moving forward through space meets resistance. It is the same when you push yourself out of your comfort zone and take chances.
4. The tipping point.
Do you back down from the challenge or do you press forward despite resistance? The tipping point is both exciting and terrifying. If you quit, lose your patience, or do something destructive, you return to step one: frustration. This doesn’t mean you failed. It means you have to start again.
5. The breakthrough.
Hang in there. Do not quit. Persevere. Your breakthrough will come. It may be a surge of confidence, maturity or self-esteem. Each time you make it through these five steps, you will feel inspired and enlivened.
